Day 11. Mayhem and Mekong Delta Magic

Well, good morning on Day 10! My day started, as usual, with a breakfast so light it practically floated away, before I was whisked off to the Mekong Delta. It's about an hour and a half away, but the journey flew by thanks to my fellow travelers – a rare chatty bunch, which was a pleasant change from the usual bus-ride hush.

Our guide, clearly a man of varied interests, first took us to a brick mill. Now, I've put photographs up that probably just look like a pile of sand, but trust me, it’s not just sand – these are rice husks being baked in a kiln you can actually walk into. Fascinating stuff, if you're into the origins of building materials, which, apparently, I am not.

From there, we transitioned to a rather extensive boat trip. The engines on our vessel belted out their own orchestral song as we channeled along, and we were treated to a delightful plate of fruit. Those red ones, the ones that taste like a pear, were truly excellent. As we puttered down the Mekong Delta, I spotted all sorts of interesting things: homes, other boats, and people just living their lives on the water. In my infinite wisdom, however, my camera battery decided this was the opportune moment to stage a coup. Changing the damn thing halfway through meant I missed a hell of a lot of the good stuff. Such is life, or rather, such is my travel luck.

It continued to be a pretty interesting day. Our last stop took us to a place way out in the middle of nowhere, where a group of old ladies were making coconut mountains. It was incredibly interesting; we all got a crack at making it. I, being the designated photographer, snapped away at everyone else’s attempts, but nobody quite managed to capture the essence of "snake juice" in their photos. It was very funny, but also quite enlightening.

We paused for lunch, and let me tell you, the fish in that photograph? Absolutely unbelievable. I'm still not entirely sure how they managed it, but it was essentially a fish grilled on two skewers, then stripped by a server and laid out on the table with rice paper. We had that with various accents (which I suspect were side dishes, not dramatic culinary flair) and it was probably the nicest and most delightfully rustic dinner out we'd had. I really enjoyed it.

Next, we trolled down to meet our little flat, long, thin boat thing. We were then paddled through the Mekong Delta, and yes, there were snakes in the water. I got a couple of photographs, but you'll be hard-pressed to spot them; they were just swimming along, doing their snakey thing. There was a bit of a laugh as the boys were in one boat and the girls in another, and the whole scene was surreal and really good.

Back on the boat we came in, we started our journey back. The guide, I must say, was very, very good. And then came the two-and-a-half-hour trip back, made all the more exciting by the local traffic. It's like watching a real-life game of Tetris, with wacky drivers defying the laws of gravity and achieving impossible end results just to squeeze into spaces that don't exist. I actually get a strange buzz out of watching the traffic here. I don't know what it is – perhaps my inner sanctum screams for mayhem – but today, there were some seriously, seriously good traffic jams. Really good ones, honestly.

Tomorrow, I'm being whisked away to the tunnels, where the Vietnamese used to fight. I'm expecting it to be very interesting indeed; I've heard so much about it, everyone talks about it. The only problem? They're getting us up at 5:30 in the damn morning again! I'm honestly not used to getting up in the middle of the night. It completely bugs up my evening. Tonight, for example, I'll likely go out, have a meal, fall asleep in my soup, then come back, switch on Netflix, find nothing to watch, end up watching CNN, and then fall asleep by 9 PM, only to be up again at 5 AM for the "joys of spring." I don't think I've had a late night past 10 PM here. The heat drains it out of you. But despite the early starts and rogue camera batteries, I'm having a blast and really enjoying it. So, I'll catch you guys tomorrow, when it's all about the tunnels and all the warmongering that went on up until 1975 when it all finally stopped.